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Map making in SA
(author unknown)
I
phoned a colleague in Cape Town and wanted to
leave a message. "Please ask him to phone me in
Polokwane," I said.
"Where?" his secretary asked sounding as if she
had bitten into a lemon, "Polokwane, where's
that?"
"Between Mokopane and Makhado in Limpopo," I
said.
"Where is that?" she asked patiently. I could
hear she thought she had a joker on the line.
"Well,"I explained, "you drive from Tshwane
past Bela-Bela and Modimolle through the
tollgate. Continue past Mokopane but watch your
speed as speed traps make lots of money from
those travelling too fast. Polokwane is just
after Mokopane but if you reach Makahado you
have gone too far."
I
was not sure how we'd ended up on the road route
when all I wanted was a telephone call.
"Just hold it right there sir," she
interrupted. "Where is Makhado?"
"Between Polokwane and Musina," I said trying
to be helpful.
"Excuse me, sir, but where is Musina?"
"Musina is between Makhado and Harare."
"Do you live in Harare?" she asked as if she'd
suddenly seen the
light.
"No," I said, "I am trying to
explain where Polokwane is."
"In Zimbabwe?" she asked hopefully.
"No, in Limpopo," I corrected her.
She gave a helpless sigh and said: "Please can
we start again."
I
thought at this stage she might be thinking she
was live on air with Leon Schuster and she
became a bit wary.
"Where is Tshwane?"
"That's easy," I said ... "between Bela-Bela and
Egoli."
No sir, I mean the town."
"So do I," said I, figuring she was now into
soapies while I was still on the road so to
speak. "Egoli is on the other side of Tshwane
when coming from the direction of Bela-Bela," I
said.
"Excuse me, have you perhaps had too much to
drink?" "No," I said, "I am not drunk. They
changed the name."
"Do you mean someone has changed your name?"
"Not my name, the town's name."
"What town's name?"
"Pietersburg."
"You live in Pietersburg!" she cried with
delight. I could detect the dawn of
understanding.
"No," I said, "I live in Polokwane, formerly
known as Pietersburg."
"No s**t?" she blurted.
"No s**t!" I confirmed. "So you're phoning from
Polokwane previously know as Pietersburg?"
"Exactly."
"Now what were all the other names you
mentioned?"
I
realised the poor lass needed a lesson in the
geography of our country pretty quickly so I
explained: "Egoli is Johannesburg. Tshwane is
Pretoria. If you travel north you pass Bela-Bela,
formerly Warmbaths, after that Modimolle that
was Nylstroom and Potgietersrus that is Mokopane
now. After Mokopane you get Polokwane that was
Pietersburg then Louis Trichardt that became
Makhado. After you have passed Makhado you get
Musina that was originally Messina."
"And Musina is by the Limpopo!" she exclaimed
triumphantly.
"Yes," I said, "but the Limpopo I was speaking
of is the province."
"What do you call the river then?"
"Limpopo,"
I said. |
